Pattern Assertion of Goal Assertion of Goal: Please describe your aptitude and motivation for graduate examine in your space of specialization, together with your preparation for this area of examine, your educational plans or analysis pursuits in your chosen space of examine, and your future profession objectives. Please be particular about why UC Berkeley could be a great mental match for you. The author of the assertion under was admitted into UC Berkeley’s Historical past Division.
Together with her permission, I reprint her essay parsed with my commentary about why it really works as a successful essay. “Luscious fare is the jewel of inordinate wishes,”1 cautions2 the writer of The Gentlewoman’s Companion (1673), considered one of many early trendy conduct books I surveyed this previous 12 months for an honors thesis entitled “‘Chaste, Silent, and Hungry’: The Downside of Feminine Urge for food in Early Trendy England, 1550-1700. three As indicated by the title, this venture explores a provocative however as of but scarcely studied aspect of early trendy gender constructions: feminine meals need. four I exploit the phrase “need” right here reasonably intentionally, as early trendy definitions of urge for food prolonged nicely past the physiological drive to eat to embody all these bodily (and shameful) longings related to the physique. And, in a tradition the place ladies have been by definition excessive and sensual, feminine meals urge for food, I argue, constituted an unruly5 need that demanded each social and ethical self-discipline.
Briefly, my analysis issues the patriarchal management of ladies’s our bodies in sixteenth and seventeenth-century England vis–vis a cultural concept about meals need and satiation as suggestive and conceited. 6 In lieu of a proper introduction of my analysis pursuits and aspirations I provide a abstract of my senior thesis, which earned me the 2003 Chancellor’s Award for Excellence in Undergraduate Analysis on the College of California, Davis. This primary enterprise into critical historic scholarship has affirmed my ardour for early trendy tradition and historical past; and it has given me the arrogance to claim and contest my opinions concerning the standing of ladies in early trendy Europe and the present state of early trendy historiography. eight Persevering with alongside these avenues of analysis in graduate faculty, I wish to use my thesis as the premise for a future dissertation. Although I stay cautious about committing myself prematurely to a selected matter of analysis, I’m additionally desirous to elaborate, modify, and complicate9 my authentic assertions in regards to the nature f the “drawback” of feminine urge for food in early trendy England. Certainly, most of the conclusions reached within the thesis, resembling my declare that the cultural eroticization of female urge for food in early trendy England betrayed a deep-seated masculine distrust of feminine sexuality and sexual energy, function beginning factors10 for future analysis and examine. On a extra fundamental degree, writing a thesis gave me the possibility to turn out to be higher acquainted with the necessities of historic analysis.
Suspecting that normative discourses in early trendy England participated aggressively within the monitoring of ladies’s appetites, I navigated the ocean of early English printed sources in pursuit of the slightest point out of meals and food plan. These sources I encountered throughout my analysis, which ranged from the favored conduct e book, The Training of a Christian Girl by Juan Luis Vives, to the nameless intercourse handbook, Aristotle’s Masterpiece, challenged my fundamental understanding of historical past and the unique premise of my thesis in methods not anticipated.
From deciphering esoteric type-fonts to creating an consciousness of the significance of time and funds, I skilled the mundane realities of analysis that inevitably stunt the historian’s aspirations. Much more essential was my gradual acceptance of the truth that early trendy sources, irrespective of how we learn them, don’t at all times accommodate trendy biases and expectations. 11 Although I can not predict the course this venture may soak up graduate faculty, I anticipate that it’s going to deal with the next themes and points.
First is the overarching problem of distinguishing the phenomena I observe from different types of meals restriction and obsession, particularly the trendy ritual of weight-reduction plan and its most excessive manifestation, an consuming dysfunction. Although not keen to evade these sophisticated (and controversial) parallels between trendy and early trendy usages of meals and meals symbolism to manage the lives of ladies, I additionally want to provide as an historian a nuanced portrayal of how early trendy conceptualizations of feminine urge for food have been infused with up to date, traditionally contingent notions of sexuality and gender.
Moreover, the query of feminine company in a venture devoted virtually solely to male prescriptions for food plan and conduct calls for additional dialogue. Admittedly, on multiple event, my very own in depth use and evaluation of conduct books and varied obstetric manuals, works composed primarily by educated males, triggered me to pause and wonder if it was finest to narrate a historical past about ladies’s actions or the patriarchal equipment below which these actions have been oppressed.
Whereas I refuse to see ladies as merely passive receptacles of masculine command, I neither want nor aspire to focus solely on their achievements; for, in my thoughts, the historical past of ladies and the historical past of patriarchy are inextricably associated. 12 My purpose, then, is not going to be to element simply one other instance of how ladies in historical past have been dominated by males, however, reasonably, to interrogate the means, on this case meals, or, higher but, the cultural that means of urge for food, by which ladies’s wishes have been suppressed or denied. 13 Certainly I’m happy with my thesis and, given additional time, may say rather more.
However I also needs to stress that that on the coronary heart of my particular analysis focus lies a extra normal curiosity in early trendy European historical past, cultural and ladies’s historical past to be extra actual. 14 Thus far, my data of the early trendy interval has been knowledgeable and my creativeness sustained by an array of programs on early trendy historical past and literature (I used to be a joint historical past and English main), together with a graduate seminar on Renaissance city tradition taught collectively by Professors Margaret Ferguson and Deborah Harkness.
My private penchant for cultural historical past stems largely, I imagine, from my coaching in literature and literary criticism, the place sensitivity to the significance of language and metaphor is a needed ability. Additionally of essential significance to an expert profession in historical past are my rising abilities in Latin and French, and my fluency in Spanish. 15 This 12 months I discover myself in that tough and irritating transitional interval between undergraduate and graduate research.
Although I’d have most popular to immediately proceed graduate faculty after commencement, I opted to take a 12 months off. A 12 months away from faculty, I reasoned, would afford me the time wanted to recuperate from an exhaustive undergraduate training, achieve some perspective, and work on fulfilling the language requirement for a doctorate in European historical past. The truth is, I’m presently enrolled in a French course at a close-by college and plan to take a subsequent course through the upcoming spring semester.
This educational hiatus, furthermore, has imposed some much- wanted distance between myself and my thesis, which I can now reread from a extra crucial, much less invested stance. And, lastly, a break from faculty has given me enough time to look and analysis for graduate packages that finest swimsuit my wants. 16 UC Berkeley’s historical past program looms giant in my thoughts, largely due to its excellent college and interdisciplinary strategy to historical past. In my very own quest for an acceptable graduate program, I used to be thrilled to study that Professors Thomas Laqueur and Carla Hesse each taught at Berkeley.
Professor Laqueur’s e book, Making Intercourse: Physique and Gender from the Greeks to Freud, stands out among the many many books I learn throughout my undergraduate training; and I credit score his e book with introducing me to the nascent however fascinating area of the historical past of sexuality and the physique. Collectively, Professor Laqueur’s leading edge analysis and Professor Hesse’s data of early trendy ladies’s historical past would make my expertise at Berkeley a difficult and pleasant one. 17 As well as, Berkeley gives a super local weather for me to develop my cross-disciplinary pursuits.
Specifically, I’m keen on pursuing a chosen emphasis in ladies, gender, and sexuality, a novel possibility that distinguishes Berkeley’s historical past program from that of different establishments. The cross-disciplinary nature of Berkeley’s graduate program would foster, I hope, fruitful discussions with different departments, notably the division of English and Girls’s Research, thus broadening and enriching my analysis in addition to my normal understanding early trendy tradition and historical past. 18 • 1 The author begins with a vivid quote that grabs the reader’s consideration straight away. 2 “Cautions” is a wonderful verb selection. Cautious phrase selection makes for full of life writing. • three Notice how neatly in a single well-packed sentence, the author will get proper to the purpose of her present analysis. • four “Provocative” is an apt and colourful phrase selection. This sentence explains the character of her examine and situates her topic in historic and thematic context. • 5 “Unruly” is one other aptly chosen adjective. Adjectives can create “useless locations” in writing in the event that they add nothing important to the noun that it’s describing. 6 The abstract sentence not solely recaps the gist of the primary paragraph, but in addition gives additional nuance of the topic at hand. • 7 This primary sentence makes clear that analysis at the beginning might be central to her argument within the essay. Mentioning the “Chancellor’s Award” within the context of her analysis is a intelligent method of boasting with out seeming to. • eight It’s a excellent concept to explicitly state the chosen subfield inside historical past: early trendy Europe. You may’t assume that your readers will make the inference from the analysis matter alone.
To “assert and contest” opinions is, in fact, the marksmanship of historians; making reference to “the present state of early trendy historiography” conveys familiarity with the topic on the one hand, and confidence and mental poise on the opposite. Discover how rather more highly effective is such a press release as in comparison with one poorly written, resembling “I’m passionate and dedicated to my curiosity in early trendy Europe. ” • 9 Once more, to say that as a historian, she’s going to “elaborate, modify, and complicate” the subject material is to indicate that she actually understands the work of historians.
A much less skilled candidate may need written that she desires to uncover the “fact” in historical past. • 10 “Beginning factors” –referring to her analysis interests–is a really measured method of claiming that she is aware of what tugs at her coronary heart, has carried out sufficient analysis to have some hunches, however is open to shock endings. A gorgeous rendition of a historian’s sentiment. It’s possible you’ll flip off your readers in case you come off sounding overly assured. Sustaining a measured tone is essential. • 11 This paragraph particulars additional particular classes and abilities earned by way of this analysis venture.
Notice using colourful verbs resembling “navigated” and “stunt. ” • 12 Notice the nuanced and punctiliously measured method of talking about her topic. Clearly the author is well-read in principle and reveals robust skill in critically evaluating her topic. Furthermore, she tries to be the “goal” scholar in that she doesn’t champion any trigger. That’s, she doesn’t champion the reason for ladies at the same time as she conveys deep empathy. • 13 The reference to a parallel instance of feminine urge for food in up to date tradition as holding curiosity for the author is aptly positioned right here.
Have been she to have talked about it any earlier, it might have clouded the primarily historic nature and focus of her enterprise. • 14 It’s smart at this level to zoom out a bit and present that the author’s curiosity lies extra broadly in early trendy Europe and the historical past of ladies. Zooming out and in from the slender to the final reveals that you’re able to changing into a specialist with out being overly slender. • 15 Exhibiting interdisciplinarity and your talents in language are key to your educational biography.
On this case, the reader learns that she is a historian with coaching in literary and demanding principle. • 16 It is a mannequin paragraph for displaying what you probably did in your “break day” from faculty. Notice how nothing extraneous to her examine is talked about on this paragraph. The paragraph reveals that the break day was spent correctly in getting ready herself for graduate faculty. • 17 She demonstrates a thorough-going data of UC Berkeley. She mentions not one however two key students with whom she may pursue her research. She mentions how their space of specialty dovetails along with her personal analysis pursuits.
Notice how she doesn’t make empty, flattering remarks in regards to the professors or the varsity. • 18 She continues to listing bounties past the division strengthening the argument that Berkeley is well-suited for her. The reader might be impressed with the analysis and the seriousness with which she has examined UC Berkeley as an possibility for graduate faculty. A well-written essay unveils a lot details about the author, not solely in her mental capability, but in addition about her character and core values. By her writing, she makes a particular impression.
